Posted by: mutantpoodle | April 1, 2009

A New Day of Comity

GOP House LeadersApril 1, 2009 – In a stunning development, Republican Congressional leaders promised today to work seriously and constructively with President Barack Obama and Democrats in Congress.

“Things may have gotten a bit out of hand lately,” said House Minority Leader John Boehner. “I mean, we all know that we made getting out of the mess we’re in much harder when we doubled the national debt during a time of economic expansion. There just aren’t a lot of good options around these days, the President is doing the best he can, and, quite frankly, we haven’t had any good ideas since we rallied around impeaching Bill Clinton.”

Meanwhile, Senator John McCain (R-AZ), announced that he was going to lay low for a while. In a brief comment to reporters after his 54th appearance on Meet the Press, McCain was unusually subdued.

“Look – Barack Obama beat me like a drum last November, largely because I ran a campaign without a single coherent unifying thought,” said McCain. “I haven’t come up with one since then, so I figured maybe I should keep my cool until I have something worthwhile and newsworthy to say.”

In related news, the Republican National Committee announced today it would start referring to its opposition as the Democratic Party. Said an unnamed spokesman, “We should have stopped with the ‘Democrat Party’ crap years ago. I mean, really, what are we – five years old?”


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